Every once in a very long while, I sense a small feeling of hollowness. I crouch and squint and find the little sea urchin somewhere under the table, in the dark little corner that everyone forgot about. Never really knew about. Only exists because I just saw it. Let's name him, 'lonely'. He's doing fine.

It never sprawls in my mind or turn my room into an ocean of tears or anything. But I do step on him I think, as I pull off all the stupid squeak and gaffes. I stare at him scornfully. I can't really do anything to him though. I can't really do anything.

I read somewhere: "A person's heart is like a little, soft round ball in the beginning. But every time he or she is hurt, they get a little thorn. As time passes and passes, they become thornier and spikier, until no one can dare even touch it. Then more scars, more thorns, more spikes. Until one day, the thorns just fill all the space, and the heart becomes a soft round ball again. Just a little bigger." Sea urchins.

For convenience, I stopped celebrating most occasions. I see pinks and chocolates and blissfully distracted people and their stress and think, meh. I don't even really think about it even as I take a bite of the free chocolate at the library. But this little picture that Up posted sort of shook the Grinch in my head and slapped my heart. It warms a little. It aches a little. Maybe.

Meh.

Happy Valentine's.

Mothagesso.

Island.