2/24/2016

I struggle to connect the gap between who I aspire to be and who I am. That gap seems to widen the more I learn, because you learn not only of ideals but how out of reach they are.

Grown ups – they're not much older anymore – remind me how great it is to be young. I find myself more fearful than ever. Thinking that others could notice I am someone-in-the-making cripples me. Am I making anything of value? Does this look derivative? Am I coming up with new ideas? Am I doing the most I can? Will I regret my twenties?

Each day, page by page, my biography is being written. It's strange to believe I have control over it.


12/17/2019

I struggle to connect the gap between who I aspire to be and who I am. I'm more okay with that today. It's more like, the higher my ideals are, the higher I reach and that's the point.

Grown ups are kids who don't remember being children. I care less about their judgment -- I feel like whenever they give me advice they're really talking to their younger selves, who they shit on and say made all the mistakes, but really they're consumed by the memory of that naiveté and passion. Experience makes you wise but also so scared all the time.